http://doityourselflady.blogspot.ca/2012/04/giveaway-time.html
Monday 23 April 2012
Saturday 21 April 2012
shoe porn giveaway!!
http://www.bloglovin.com/m/2816839/430573081/a/0/aHR0cCUzQSUyRiUyRnd3dy5wdXJlZ2xhbS50diUyRnB1cmUtbGFiZWxzLW5ld3MlMkYyMDEyJTJGMDQlMkZjaHJpc3RpYW4tbG91Ym91dGluLWhpZ2gtaGVlbHMtZ2l2ZWF3YXktd2luLWEtcGFpci1vZi1oaWdoLWhlZWxzLTIyNTclMkY=
is shoe porn!!!
is shoe porn!!!
Wednesday 18 April 2012
glutton for punishment
I have to start questioning my own sanity when i read through 200 pages of notes from my doctor that do not reflect anything i remember telling her,contain erroneous errors of time and dates,and ultimately say without saying that she's been placating me for the last almost two years.
I'd rather buy nail polish than go to my doctors appointments, except i'm out of three of my meds and can. in two days feel the pain and the heart pounding and the anxiety building and the fear making me shut down. Howis this possible,i can't leave my safety bubble, and won't let anyone in to it.
I never go anywhere that i could wear the nail polish,it's just the latest in my endless list of fleeting obsessions.
I'm back at the point where i want to leave, so i need to find a place where it's worth leaving to...
I'm sick of being alone, and at the same time i don't want anyone near me.
I guess I'm so fucking messed up from theYeti breaking my heart, destroying my trust and faith, that i'm just finished with even trying to invest in people, and even myself, the people i've let get close to me continue to hurt me, the people i've loved my entire life hurt me.
But nail polish,well that's easy, put it on take it off, it's never perfect,but that's ok.
I'd rather buy nail polish than go to my doctors appointments, except i'm out of three of my meds and can. in two days feel the pain and the heart pounding and the anxiety building and the fear making me shut down. Howis this possible,i can't leave my safety bubble, and won't let anyone in to it.
I never go anywhere that i could wear the nail polish,it's just the latest in my endless list of fleeting obsessions.
I'm back at the point where i want to leave, so i need to find a place where it's worth leaving to...
I'm sick of being alone, and at the same time i don't want anyone near me.
I guess I'm so fucking messed up from theYeti breaking my heart, destroying my trust and faith, that i'm just finished with even trying to invest in people, and even myself, the people i've let get close to me continue to hurt me, the people i've loved my entire life hurt me.
But nail polish,well that's easy, put it on take it off, it's never perfect,but that's ok.
Tuesday 17 April 2012
Cushie Blogger: Cushing's Awareness Challenge Bloggers
Cushie Blogger: Cushing's Awareness Challenge Bloggers: Seventeen days in and these participants are all doing a great job! Over halfway there. Alicia http://alliwantisworldpeace.blogspot...
Fishbowl Living: Regional Rile-Up - Silent Strength
Fishbowl Living: Regional Rile-Up - Silent Strength: Hey readers! I'm back, with yet another piece on the Oshawa Social Reform movement (a name given by me, and in no way the official represe...
flutter and sparkle: 1,000 followers giveaway - Naked 2 palette!
flutter and sparkle: 1,000 followers giveaway - Naked 2 palette!: As a massive thank you to all those who read and follow my blog, leave comments and generally support me, I'm doing a 1,000 followers givea...
Sunday 15 April 2012
Cushings Disease/Syndrome - thehell my life has become
i've been suffering with a horrid disease for the last 3+ years, i self medicated for a good year, before i got to the point where my body was revolting in dangerous ways, blacking out in the kitchen at work, projectile vomiting while trying to cook dinner for 100+ people, feeling suicidal, fainting a lot, and after a battery of tests. I was diagnosed with Cushings syndrome.
I moved from my idyllic little island to Ontario, reuniting with my family and lost friends, and it's been more of a struggle since.
I was always a social butterfly,i spent the first month in toronto afraid to leave harry's house.Went to peterborough and continued my hermitted ways, unable to go anywhere without my sister or my parents.
It's been over two years and what i know is:
I have Empty sella syndrome (abbreviated ESS) is a disorder that involves the sella turcica, a bony structure at the base of the brain that surrounds and protects the pituitary gland. ESS is a condition that is often discovered during tests for pituitary disorders, when radiological imaging of the pituitary gland reveals a sella turcica that appears to be empty, however this oneis not empty, it's partially full of fluid and leaks into my brain, 4rendering my puitatary gland in operable, but they're not too concerned about this.
There are two types of ESS: primary and secondary
Primary ESS happens when a small anatomical defect above the pituitary gland increases pressure in the sella turcica and causes the gland to flatten out along the interior walls of the sella turcica cavity. Primary ESS is associated with obesity and high blood pressure in women. The disorder can be a sign of idiopathic intracranial hypertension
Secondary ESS is the result of the pituitary gland regressing within the cavity after an injury, surgery, or radiation therapy. Individuals with secondary ESS due to destruction of the pituitary gland have symptoms that reflect the loss of pituitary functions, such as the ceasing of menstrual periods, infertility, fatigue, and intolerance to stress and infection.
I also know that there are multiple lesionsin my lower left lung, which have been biopsied and nothing was confirmed or denied,after 8 months the lesions have not grown nor shrunk(even after they removed mass during the biopsies), so they feel it's nothing to worry about. over75% of my left lung is badly scarred.I went from being told they'd have to remove part of it,to it's nothing to worry about.
My left ovary is one large tumour the size of a grapefruit.my right one has6 tumours ranging in size from 5 mm to 5 cm's, i finally received a gyno referral for August...
There are problems with my kidney and liver, my blood sugar is boarder line diabetic, my GI track is a mess, i can no longer digest gluten or dairy, raw fruits and veggies, and my food allergy list keep growing.
Sometimes i really wanna curl up in a ball and die.
Other days something simple as a new nail polish makes my month.
I'm an emotional wreck.
Most of my friends can't stand to be around me because i'm too fucking depressing.
I've been single since i left Mark. and i'm stupid lonely, but don't have the effort to bring anyone into my life.
if you've gotten this far,you're a saint.
please click this link so we can raise some funds to try and figure out this disease,
http://cushingsawareness.korlym.com/
And if you wanna know more...you can ask.
I moved from my idyllic little island to Ontario, reuniting with my family and lost friends, and it's been more of a struggle since.
I was always a social butterfly,i spent the first month in toronto afraid to leave harry's house.Went to peterborough and continued my hermitted ways, unable to go anywhere without my sister or my parents.
It's been over two years and what i know is:
I have Empty sella syndrome (abbreviated ESS) is a disorder that involves the sella turcica, a bony structure at the base of the brain that surrounds and protects the pituitary gland. ESS is a condition that is often discovered during tests for pituitary disorders, when radiological imaging of the pituitary gland reveals a sella turcica that appears to be empty, however this oneis not empty, it's partially full of fluid and leaks into my brain, 4rendering my puitatary gland in operable, but they're not too concerned about this.
There are two types of ESS: primary and secondary
Primary ESS happens when a small anatomical defect above the pituitary gland increases pressure in the sella turcica and causes the gland to flatten out along the interior walls of the sella turcica cavity. Primary ESS is associated with obesity and high blood pressure in women. The disorder can be a sign of idiopathic intracranial hypertension
Secondary ESS is the result of the pituitary gland regressing within the cavity after an injury, surgery, or radiation therapy. Individuals with secondary ESS due to destruction of the pituitary gland have symptoms that reflect the loss of pituitary functions, such as the ceasing of menstrual periods, infertility, fatigue, and intolerance to stress and infection.
I also know that there are multiple lesionsin my lower left lung, which have been biopsied and nothing was confirmed or denied,after 8 months the lesions have not grown nor shrunk(even after they removed mass during the biopsies), so they feel it's nothing to worry about. over75% of my left lung is badly scarred.I went from being told they'd have to remove part of it,to it's nothing to worry about.
My left ovary is one large tumour the size of a grapefruit.my right one has6 tumours ranging in size from 5 mm to 5 cm's, i finally received a gyno referral for August...
There are problems with my kidney and liver, my blood sugar is boarder line diabetic, my GI track is a mess, i can no longer digest gluten or dairy, raw fruits and veggies, and my food allergy list keep growing.
Sometimes i really wanna curl up in a ball and die.
Other days something simple as a new nail polish makes my month.
I'm an emotional wreck.
Most of my friends can't stand to be around me because i'm too fucking depressing.
I've been single since i left Mark. and i'm stupid lonely, but don't have the effort to bring anyone into my life.
if you've gotten this far,you're a saint.
please click this link so we can raise some funds to try and figure out this disease,
http://cushingsawareness.korlym.com/
And if you wanna know more...you can ask.
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